LAST week the question was put to me: "Did I know what a 'shool' was? I surely did, for shool is a dialect word for a shovel.

It took me back a bit to when, as lads, we had to 'shool muck inta t'barrow' night and morning to clean out the shippons or cow sheds.

Often in winter the council used to send out men when the snow lay in deep drifts to shool snow away that was too deep for the snow plough.

Do I hear somebody say: "Where were they this year?"

The question continued with: "Could I shed any light on what was a 'croo'."

"With pleasure," said I.

A 'croo' was another name for a sty.

In dialect they were called pig croos.

Sometimes a calf box would be called a 'cauf croo'.

It was getting to be a bit like question time.

When someone else chimed in, I thought hello, they're trying to stump me and I don't know how long I can last.

The next question was: "What is a pette?" "Ah", says I "that's an easy one.

It is an earth closet."

When someone said: "Ah's gahn to t'pette," that's where they were going.

Just when I thought I was home and dry yet another question was fired at me: "Have you heard of 'ess' then?" I certainly had, in fact, I'd often shooled it for ess is dialect for peat ash.

It was rich in potash and good for the garden.

I was pleased to be reminded of these old dialect words which I hope can be kept alive for years to come.

Words I have heard quite enough of and don't want to hear quite so much of this year are those like globalisation.

Trendy they may be but that's about all.

What do you make of the word put out over the television and in the press that if you are late paying income tax due in January you will suffer the dire penalty of having to pay interest.

Now, as the Prime Minister is keen to have everyone using computers, and as the Ministry of Agriculture (to name but one) is months late making its payments, their reason given is "that the computer system can't cope with the new regulations."

Well, do you suppose that if you get one of these dreaded bills for interest, that if you write back and say your computer cannot cope with the new regulations, you will be let off; what's sauce for the goose and all that.

Not forgetting, of course, the old saying that went like this: "There's someat as is warse than paying income tax, and that's hevin none to pay."

Maybe if the Ministry keeps on being late with its payments I'll send Tony Blair a bill for interest, but on second thoughts I might not like prison food.

Then again I might.

Thought for the day: We need more watchdogs at the Treasury and fewer bloodhounds at Inland Revenue.